It's Who I Am

I was recently asked who I am, "Who is Heather?"
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(I put lots of space because I am thinking and I want you to think about who you are too.)  I thought about this while running last week.  Sometimes I love to just enjoy the scenery, other times, I let my mind wander all over the place.   I chose to focus on the question that had been posed to me.

Who is Heather?

I started a list in my head about who I am:

I am a Mother of three wonderful children.
I am a lifelong runner.  I've completed half marathons and the Tough Mudder.
I am someone who likes to dream big and start big things.
I am a giver.  I love to help other people.

So, my list began to take on one main characteristic.  It revolved around things I had done.  I thought further on this.  Is this really what defines me, the things I do or achieve?  Then I thought about how the way we perceive ourselves largely impacts how others see us.  If we truly believe in something about ourselves, we have the power to make it happen.  We can learn to live self-fulfilling prophecies and thus encourage and enable others to see us in a different light.

In my ever-evolving way of thinking, I moved back to my original question of ,"Who is Heather?" Seriously, my thoughts wander back and forth so much that if you could take a picture of my thought process, I imagine you would see and intricate spider web criss-crossing back over itself hundreds of times.  Who is Heather?  If I focus on who I am as a conglomeration of my accomplishments, I could easily add in a list of things I have not accomplished.   This is potentially dangerous.  Therein lies the possibility to turn against myself and develop a negative self-fulfilling prophecy.  I could easily focus on what I did not do.

My children do not always like me.
I did not complete a full marathon.
I don't always finish my big dreams.
I didn't give enough of myself to others.

How easily you could slip into a negative thought process if you define yourself only by things you have not done!  Let's dive deeper into my complex web of thought.  How else could I define who I am other than by what I have done or not done?  My answer to this came after I completed my run because I was trying to remember a quote from Coach John Wooden.  Here is what he felt defined a person: character.  "Be more concerned with your character than your reputation because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are."  Character as defined by Merriam-Webster is, "the way someone thinks, feels and behaves; someone's personality."  OK!  So, who I am is not just defined by what I have done.  I am also defined by how I think and how I feel.  Let's look at something I have not done.  I have not completed a half marathon in less than 1:55:00.  This alone does not define me.  It tells of my ability at that time.  However, I also have the ability to change that, to grow and improve.  Who I am also involves how I react to that number.  I can develop my mindset to react in a positive way so that I become not just someone who didn't achieve something.  I am someone who moved forward with a new goal in mind and a plan to make it happen.

Ultimately, who I am is measured more in how I react to events, circumstances and a myriad of things beyond my control.  I have all the power in me in my reactions.  What a freeing concept!