What comes into the head of an addict who finally comes to the realization that they must change their habits to become healthier, to heal? Although I am not an addict to drugs, alcohol or nicotine, I do have some side effects when I am unable to run, my family surely can attest to that. Personally, each day becomes a struggle to think beyond I can not currently do. It is possible though, and to heal physically, it takes great mental courage to move forward.
I was on my way to running in a half marathon in just a few weeks. About two weeks ago, I mentioned to a friend that my foot was hurting a little. Now, one would think that since I have a college degree in physical education and fitness coupled with the fact that I have been running for over a quarter century (that doesn't make me feel old, only proud)... that I would have the sense to analyze my situation before it leads to further injury. Well, when you love something so much, you are blinded. I was blinded from the pain, my body was sending a message. I did not stop, I ran my regular runs and a hard speed run, on pavement of all ridiculous things. I was 1.5 miles from home when my foot hurt so bad, it brought tears to my eyes. I knew instantly that I had pushed it too far. Me being the guru of running that I convinced myself of, took a whole one week off. I even had suggestion that to heal from what I knew was a stress fracture on the top of my foot (unfortunately I know it from experience) would take more than one week. I was determined to try, partly because I love to run, partly because my brother asked me to run and partly because it was the warmest day of the year so far, sporting 53 degrees. So, armed with the excitement of getting out there in shorts, we did our short trial run. It took me only one mile in to realize, things were not better. It took me probably one more minute of thought to realize that I was at least one month past needing new shoes. So, I knew I must break the bad news. Honey, I need new shoes, please!
So what does come into my head upon all this realization? Why did I not think to get new shoes? I know better. Why did I not listen to my friend and wait longer? I know better. Why does the person who has the drive to run in absolutely any weather have to get hurt? The recurring theme... because I thought I knew better. Turns out, I did not. My body knew better. Now, I must listen to what my body says and let it heal. However, as I've stated, I am an addict. Without that burn I feel in my muscles, I am lost. Without that sense of accomplishment each day, I am lost. Without that ache mid day, reminding me that I met my exercise goal, I am lost. Without all that, I am not me. So, with the power of positive thinking, I jump on my bike, I lace up my punching gloves and I find other activities to keep me occupied and somewhat sane as I heal.
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