Back On the Road Again

Yes, I took a one year siesta from this writing.

So much has happened and been accomplished!  I've have successfully run my own cleaning service for one year.  I broke my ankle AND recovered. I started a new blog on ice cream AND I have not turned into a blimp from eating ice cream and not running.  Kudos to me!

Today marked the 5 1/2 month mark since I broke my ankle and have not been able to run.  Today is a big day for me.  I have not been off running for that long since I began running as a young teen.  That was 28 years ago.

What have I learned?  I've learned yoga can be fun, even with a cast from my knee to foot.

Probably the most important thing I learned was to sit still and be patient.  I couldn't get out much because it was winter.  Snow and crutches do not mix well.  However, if willing one can have fun.  Truly, I learned to rest and be still.  See that little thing on the left of my foot?  I had to attach myself to a machine twice a day for 20 minutes.  Bonus, reading and prayer time!  I still take that time, what a blessing.

Fast forward to today.  I went RUNNING!  I plan to start out slow and build slow.  I completed one half mile.  My thoughts as I ran consisted of much self talk to step carefully.  I looked down at the pavement most of the time for fear I would step wrong, twist my ankle and end up in a cast again.  I pondered what an opposite activity I have taken up since I was unable to run.  Seriously, ice cream reviews!  I can't think of a worse idea.  Somehow, trying all that ice cream reminded me how much I miss running.  Run to eat ice cream?   Sometimes. 

The little time that I let my mind wander from the pavement in that full 8 minutes of running, I thought about how I have to go back to my favorite frozen treat place, Rhapsodies, to complete their interview.  Check out my other blog: Destination Ice Cream!

As my runs increase, so will my observations as a runner.  Keep following, we may end up having ice cream together!      

It's Who I Am

I was recently asked who I am, "Who is Heather?"
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(I put lots of space because I am thinking and I want you to think about who you are too.)  I thought about this while running last week.  Sometimes I love to just enjoy the scenery, other times, I let my mind wander all over the place.   I chose to focus on the question that had been posed to me.

Who is Heather?

I started a list in my head about who I am:

I am a Mother of three wonderful children.
I am a lifelong runner.  I've completed half marathons and the Tough Mudder.
I am someone who likes to dream big and start big things.
I am a giver.  I love to help other people.

So, my list began to take on one main characteristic.  It revolved around things I had done.  I thought further on this.  Is this really what defines me, the things I do or achieve?  Then I thought about how the way we perceive ourselves largely impacts how others see us.  If we truly believe in something about ourselves, we have the power to make it happen.  We can learn to live self-fulfilling prophecies and thus encourage and enable others to see us in a different light.

In my ever-evolving way of thinking, I moved back to my original question of ,"Who is Heather?" Seriously, my thoughts wander back and forth so much that if you could take a picture of my thought process, I imagine you would see and intricate spider web criss-crossing back over itself hundreds of times.  Who is Heather?  If I focus on who I am as a conglomeration of my accomplishments, I could easily add in a list of things I have not accomplished.   This is potentially dangerous.  Therein lies the possibility to turn against myself and develop a negative self-fulfilling prophecy.  I could easily focus on what I did not do.

My children do not always like me.
I did not complete a full marathon.
I don't always finish my big dreams.
I didn't give enough of myself to others.

How easily you could slip into a negative thought process if you define yourself only by things you have not done!  Let's dive deeper into my complex web of thought.  How else could I define who I am other than by what I have done or not done?  My answer to this came after I completed my run because I was trying to remember a quote from Coach John Wooden.  Here is what he felt defined a person: character.  "Be more concerned with your character than your reputation because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are."  Character as defined by Merriam-Webster is, "the way someone thinks, feels and behaves; someone's personality."  OK!  So, who I am is not just defined by what I have done.  I am also defined by how I think and how I feel.  Let's look at something I have not done.  I have not completed a half marathon in less than 1:55:00.  This alone does not define me.  It tells of my ability at that time.  However, I also have the ability to change that, to grow and improve.  Who I am also involves how I react to that number.  I can develop my mindset to react in a positive way so that I become not just someone who didn't achieve something.  I am someone who moved forward with a new goal in mind and a plan to make it happen.

Ultimately, who I am is measured more in how I react to events, circumstances and a myriad of things beyond my control.  I have all the power in me in my reactions.  What a freeing concept!

                       

It's Not Magic, It's Acceptance

I have been inspired!  A friend of mine had foot surgery about 6 months ago and was unable to walk much less run for quite a while.  I could relate to her because I had vein surgery once and could not run for 6 weeks.  It was brutal to not have my normal coping mechanism, running, available.  Well, I made it through that trial and so has my friend.  In fact, she just completed a half marathon.  Congratulations!  She helped waked me up, not literally but mentally and emotionally.  I need to get my butt back to working hard.  Yes, I've been through some rough and testing times over the past 6 months and I feel I've done the best I could in the area of exercise.  I've kept running and that is good.  I have not run fast nor long distance but I revel in the fact that I still pushed forward each week and did run.  I believe we must all accept that sometimes the best we can do one day is not the same as others.  Now, as I have healed and had some tremendous accomplishments in my life, I am able to move forward in bigger steps.  Another friend of mine agreed to tackle 6 miles this morning on a beautiful sunrise trail run.  Acceptance was a central theme in my thoughts as we ran and that is my topic for today, acceptance.

We all face trials in our lives.  We all make mistakes in our lives.  At some point, likely multiple times, we come to a point where we must come to terms with our situation.  We must accept not only that we are the reason for where we are at.  It isn't always someone else's fault.  We must accept accountability and responsibility for our actions and our decisions.  That is the tough part.  Next, comes the joyful realization that we have the power to make the change.  It only stands to logical reasoning, we got ourselves here, thus we can get ourselves to a different place.  I truly believe though that one can not fully embrace their ability to change without first accepting responsibility for where they are at.  Maybe one person is over the weight they want to be and have been most of their life.  They may lay blame on their upbringing, money, not having support, can't stick to a diet.  There can be a myriad of reasons you come up with.  There will be no change though until you reach the realization that there is no magic pill, no way for you to bury what has brought you here, no running away.  You must accept, deal and move forward.  My run this morning helped cement that for me.  I did 6 miles, more than I have done in 6 months.  Yes, my friend encouraged me by agreeing to wake early and run but ultimately we each made the decision ourselves to actually get out of bed and run.  It's definitely easier with help but you must make the choice.  Surround yourself with your friends, your family, your support, your faith.  They will help but remember, they can't do it for you.  Find it in yourself.  Accept where you are at and realize that you can move to where you want to be in life.  You have the strength and ability within yourself.

      

Running & Trusting, How They Relate

Some days are easier to exercise than others.  On certain days, I feel like I could run forever (forever is a long time by the way, only God can do anything forever) and other days it is such a struggle that I want to give up and head back early.  What would that get me though?  I'd be heading back with a sense of not fulfilling what I set out to which could turn into thoughts of failure.  Or I could keep going, knowing that I can do this and let that carry me through my day, knowing I can push forward through anything.  I could head back early and maybe miss out on something.  Many times, I plan my route so I can see the sunrise.  If I head back soon, I may not see that beauty that I look forward to.  I could head back early with thoughts that I have more time for something else.  Then again, why did I come out in the first place?  I am already up, dressed for the activity and actually doing it.  I may as well follow the laws of physics and remain in motion...forward motion!  

As I kept running one of these tougher days, I thought about how my running relates to trusting in God.  Why is it so easy to trust in my runs and God on the easy days?  Sure, it is easy to follow God when the road is easy, same as running.  It's when we encounter those hills, those high winds and those unfavorable conditions in our life that both the running and trusting in God seems difficult.  When you find yourself amidst one of those times, remember, you are already here in the middle of it.  God brought you here and HE will bring you through it just fine.  We are never faced with anything we are not able to endure.   

Gratitude in Planning Ahead

I've talked previously about planning ahead to make sure you are prepared for your runs and how you can apply that to your everyday routine to avoid surprises in your day.  This week, I planned ahead so that I was able to completely enjoy the late season snow that was predicted for the pre-dawn hours.  You see, we had an unusually long warm stretch for a week earlier this month.  I cautiously reveled in the sun and near 60 degree temps as did everyone else.  (It's always so much fun to see how the outdoor population increases so dramatically on these short warm spurts.)  In addition to fully taking part of as much outdoor activity to boost my vitamin D levels as I could, I kept in mind that I do live in Wisconsin and on occasion it does snow as late as April.  I saw this week that we were to get a snow overnight Tuesday.  I generally run at 5am.  While many others I came into contact with yesterday were complaining about the snow, I tried to redirect them to the forecast of 47 degrees today.  That's means the although it would be cooler at night and yes snow would fall, it would also melt.  Early this morning, I got out my cleats for my shoes and headed out.  The snow was so beautiful!  The temp was 30 degrees, for a winter runner this is amazing weather.  I was warm, lightly dressed and comfortable.  The snow continued to fall as I ran through a silent, fresh winter wonderland.  I rested assured that later today, this would all melt and we would still be on our way to Spring.  I had the best of both worlds!  I had my cake and ate it too!  Thus, the power of knowledge and preparation enabled me to truly bask in the splendor and beauty of the early morning snow and fully appreciate the times the snow has peaked out to warm us today. 

I'm Baaaaaaaaaack!

Oh yes, that is a line from a movie I am fond of, "Armageddon."  It signifies that someone who has not been heard from is back and with something BIG to say!

A year of many significant life changes has left me with little time to post.  Do you remember taking those stress tests in school?  Scientists Holmes and Raher assigned values to negative stressors based upon their significance in your life.  Basically, the higher the score, the more negative stress you have which theoretically increase your likelihood of developing unhealthy habits or sicknesses.  I decided that since I feel I've dealt with pretty much every form of negatives stress in the past 6 months, with the exception of death, that I should take this test again.  My reason for taking it is to show that I have proven how that no matter what each day brings, we can overcome!  Let's take a look first at a few things I realized about myself and then how I have dealt with my stress over the past 12 months.

First, I became thankful for the things that I have not experienced to add stress to my life.

1. I have not been arrested or sent to jail for anything. Yeah!
2. None of my children have left home.  Yeah!
3. None of my friends or family members have died. Yeah!
4. I did have an outstanding personal achievement.  I got a personal best in a 5K race. Yeah!

Since I already know I have a high score, I chose not to focus on that, rather on the positive.  HOW did I do this?  HOW did I manage to not get sick during these "stressful" 6 months?  I focused on four main things.

1. I pray.  I mean truly talked to God and asked for help because no amount of running would be enough to get me through all these changes.
2. I am leaning on family and friends.  Everyone always tells us to do that.  Maybe you can relate to me, if you are a giver.  Leaning on others, accepting help, even accepting words of encouragement can be very difficult if you are used to being the one offering support.  I learned.  I lean.
3. I keep exercising.  I know this is a stress reliever for me.  I also realize that I simply am not able to do as much as normal, but some is still excellent for me.  I may not be logging long miles, but I am still logging.  I realize it is the best I can do right now and it will get better.
4. I keep a list.  I decided that focusing on the bad is way too limiting.  I began and still keep a list of my accomplishments.  It began with something as simple as getting my own cell phone with my own money. Simple, but powerful.  Whenever I feel myself being sucked into the deep pool of self-pity, I read over my list, I pray, I exercise, I ask for help!

I am happy to say that I have survived and I am thriving!  Each day does bring challenges, some are heart wrenching and take all the strength within me and an unknown amount of strength I gain from God, family and friends.  What I know now is that I will make it.  In the midst of all that goes on in my life, life keeps going.  The clouds still form, the world keeps spinning, life goes on and I'm not going to miss it!

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

It's -9 degress, go! It's raining, go! It's 20 mile winds, go!  Why you may ask am I crazy enough to answer like that and yes, I do run in those conditions. So do others. Again though, why?  I do it because not only does it make me stronger, it also helps me realize that I am able to make adjustments so I can endure an otherwise unpleasant situation. If the roads are icy, I put on my cleats so I do not slip and fall. If it's windy, I plan my route so my return path, when I am tired, is with the wind, pushing me home.  In winter months, I get up a few minutes earlier to allow myself time to put on extra gear for warmth and still have my precious run time.  I apply what I learn from running to see how I can adapt my tools, path and time to overcome and avoid obstacles and still reach my goals. I did run in -9 degrees last week because if I can adapt and get through that, then I can handle anything the day throws my way.


 Life is full opportunities for making adjustments and adaptations, take advantage of them and watch yourself grow!